and God reveals His heart...

well last night i just totally forgot about my blog and didn't post anything...and well that is no big deal since nothing really happened yesterday at all!hahaha but today is a different story...you see as the new year began, i have prayed daily that God would convict my heart of whatever He sees a need for me to be convicted of...i place no boundaries on this prayer but have been diligent in praying this...so the first thing i was convicted of immediately was my lack of time spent with the Lord...the lack of time i spend just being with Him. so, thats an easy fix...right? well...i waivered here and there...i am not perfect...but as i revealed the other night, my solution is to leave a Bible in my car and to read it throughout the day...and what a difference this solution has made in my life in the past week. now, i find myself yearning to read more...to want to get to my destination so i can begin reading again...it has been so nice.
well, then He convicted me of my lack of focus...or my add as i like to say. you see...i have a focusing problem...i can't finish sentences, i move every year, i have a hard time remembering, let alone finishing my goals. i mean i am a hot mess sometimes. But the beautiful thing is...God has stilled my heart in these times...He has focused me. Now, i am not saying i still don't have my moments but...they are fewer. if you know me, i firmly believe God made all of us perfectly the way He wanted...and I just believe that part of me will always be a free spirt. My prayer now is that I will have a disciplined heart that serves God and follows His plans for me...
So...yeah those are just two of my recent convictions...the biggest i would say...until tonight...see today during my quiet time, i was reading in Mark that Jesus desires for us to have servant hearts...that it is our responsibility to serve and minister to those around us...well i thought..."yeah, ok...well that is a good point and prayed about it." and then i moved on with my day...so then tonight i am watching tv and i really don't know if any of you watched this but it was the story of the children of the appalachia (sp) mountains...really just the people of the mountains. now, i am not a huge crier...i have cried more the older i have gotten but i am still not a huge crier...and i sat and i watched the entire program with a constant flow of tears...then there it was...another moment where God caught my attention...you see i never understood those who say "Jesus gave me a heart for the people of ____ (insert country here)" well...i can truly say, that Jesus just gave me a desire in my heart for these people...and i don't know what to do with it. I thought back to my time in high school youth when we used to go to Mountain T.O.P...which was a ministry to the people in the Appalachain Mountains...however, it stopped the year i moved up to the youth group...i never went. to be honest, i have never done any type of huge missions...i mean i have done local things but nothing out of my comfort zone...so, people, i guess what this is about is now i have this opening...this desire to help the people affected by the endless cycle of poverty and ignorance of their ancestors...it is the saddest thing ever. you see, i don't understand how people can give money and build things for children of poverty in other countries when our neighbors in tennessee, kentucky, virginia are all being raised in extreme poverty...
so watch below for a bit of what i am talking about....
here is the preview clip of the show:

here is a clip from the actual show:


so where do i go with this desire? what do i do? i don't know...but i know that i will pray about it and hopefully God will once again still my heart to hear what His desire for me is...that is my desire...
so, i know this was heavy...a little deep...but it is where i am today...being convicted...loving my Heavenly Daddy...and just taking it step by step...
as far as all else in my life..work is good...my clients are doing phenomenal...today one of them did a harder level of yoga and another paid for all of her stuff with minimal assist and made it through the whole session with minimal problems....i am so proud of them and thankful for them...
oh and i sent my nieces and fam valentine's presents...ada grace was ecstatic or so i like to think and i am sure if ainslee could talk she would say "aunt juju rocks!" also, my cousin buddy and deedee had their twins...one boy/one girl and they are in nicu in jackson, ms. please keep them in your prayers. nothing big...just in need of some oxygen every so often so we are praying they are released soon!
so, there you go...life with julia...stay tuned for more
love you all...